The Day's Eyes

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The Day’s Eye

Sunday evening with friends, that’s how I spent the day and that time i went home and i found him Carl, my boyfriend. standing still as he covered all of his head part with a Beanie hat. I ask him

"where did your hair go? did your mother ask you to make your head bald like this ? (Giggle)"

he sat down in the sofa and he replied "No daisy, do you remember yesterday you say it by yourself that you love a bald guy like him (pointing to my screensaver Chris Daughtry)"

then i said "hahahaha, but it’s different he looks cool! not like yours and those skinny body haha" i feel like rude to him but i didn't meant to, just joking. but i see him giggling a little.
with such confident he said:

" Meh, i look better with it :p"

and then he smiled. just to see his smile it means the world to me.. so,i simply said "Oh god.. i love that smile of yours"
he didn't say anything but continue smiling and then stroke my hair.

after giggling around. he suddenly stop smiling and then sighing, as he remember something. he said :

"Hey.. do you know? the days are waiting."

He sounds like he just lost something
i was clueless for what he said and i thought he meant something about my birthday. so the conversation is begin

Daisy: "Oh, do you mean my birthday ? whats wrong?"
Carl: "Y..ye..yeah, What do you want for your birthday?"

Daisy: "hmm.. sound legit.. you usually don't ask me for present.. you always love to give it with surprise right ? :D"
Carl: "yeah, but this time is different.. its...SPECIAL! don't you get it? (smile)"

Daisy: "well in that case..then i waant.. hmm.. somehow i wanna see a bunch of flower.. daisy flower :D just like my name :) But to be honest, i never see Daisy flower before.."
Carl: "Really ? you never see it?"
Daisy: "well, i mean i never see the real one"
Carl: "hey believe what .. i've seen one, its sooo beautiful. when i first saw it, i really think i should keep it and bring it to home to accompany me"
Daisy: "i already know what you mean.. now.. i think its time for you to go home carl, i need to sleep its pretty late now"
Carl: "Alright then, Good Night"

then he walked out to the door.i'm standing from back watching him go. I’m really worried about his health, since the last time i saw him passed out . he didn't tell me what happened

but i know. i know something wrong.

i tried to ask his friend but all they said "it’s not something serious, don't worry about it".
Before he really close the door. he said :

"hey .. I will bring you a bunch of Daisy flower. I promise."

after brusing teeth and wash my face, i went to bed and try to close my eyes and try to sleep. all i can think is his face and smile.it makes me happy just to think about him. well, i'm not the type of lovey dovey or melancholy girl. but since i met him.i reallly became Hopeless Romantic, it really feel like a beautiful music box that won't stop.

the next day, i went to see him. and go to his apartement to tell him that i have a plan for weekend time. i knock the door,but he won't answer. I tried to knock hard.. but still he won't open .. he had me worried. then i tried to call him but he won't answer it. but the door is not locked so i just pass through to see him.

"He..hello?, carl are you here?"
my goodness.. this room is so messed up.. whats wrong with that Mr.Neat i always know..
i can't find him in his bed room or kitchen, there's only one room i can check, his music box collection room. when i open it he just sit down in the corner and play a really beautiful music box. he didn't say anything and do anything. i close the door and sit beside him, i don't dare to ask him why, i'm too afraid to hear what happened.

so i decide to just enjoy the music with him..
while the music box playing through he said:

Carl: "hey.. do you ever wondering... about the coincidence between our names?" with a really weak voice.
Daisy: "wh.. what do you mean..?"
Carl: "here come closer, let me tell you a story."

so i get closer and leaning my head to his shoulder. then,he continued to his story.

Carl: "a long time ago a man named Carl Linnaeus found a very beautifull flower. he saw the flower open at dawn, then he called it daisy from the word "day's eye", for the way in which it opens at dawn."

Daisy: "..."

Carl: "Do you remeber when we first met in the park at dawn? you were there standing beside me to

see i feed that homeless kitty. i found you just like Carl Linnaeus found his first beautiful Daisy, That brown eyes tell me, I already found my precious flower .. his Day's Eye..."

Daisy: "I .. i believe it’s a sign.. that we were meant to be together"

Carl: "I know right, (smile softly). just like the sky that always have a golden dawn for us to face the day.. beautiful and yet.. so short"

Daisy: "Carl.."

Carl: "... Yes?"

Daisy: "Can i ask you something?"

Carl: "Go on"

Daisy: "are you okay?"

Carl: ".. i'm okay.."

Daisy: "i know something wrong carl.."

Carl: " No.. Nothing wrong.. something just go on as they meant to be.."

it getting more clear.. the bald hair, the eye socket, the thin body and pale face.. he is sick.. i can't hold my tears anymore, i hugged him and said

Daisy: " D..Do... don't say anything more.. okay?.. just go back to sleep.. yeah?"

Carl: "i will sleep.. but don't go home yet okay ?"

with weak foot i help him to stand up and walk him to his bed room. he lay there in his bed. a lot of question i want to ask him, but I know its not the time.
i hold his hand. is cold.. his putting his hand over my cheek to wipe off the tears..
I accidently burst into tears to see that smile of him..i love his smile.. but not in this Condition..

"Hey.. hey .. now now.. Don't cry .. everything will be fine.. listen.. how about ..we go out tommorow at the dawn? i have something special for you"

"yeah sure"

He sleeps, now i will accompany him until the dawn.. i can't sleep, so i just go check out his colection of music box.he once said that most of his collection is done by himself. i randomly pick one music box. it has lock in it. i can't open it. the one with "Truth" written on it.i give up try to guess the number but it won’t work..  with his birthday, or mine or our anniversary. but then i saw a small music box with "Day's Eye" written top of it. Without a padlock on it.. i played it..
 then the music start..
then i space out.. somehow i just feel like this melody makes me feel cozy, and yet lonely. beautiful tone that make me remember all memories we had... suddenly, my tears fall down over and over again..

it hurts.. but i want to keep listening to it.. 
the songs end.i'm trying to play it again, but it won't start.. i tried to turning it on.. but it won't play..

"now.. i.. I wonder why dawn must be that short.. just like this song.."

Something has crossed my mind

They said.. Daisy is the symbol of truth.. but the truth it just to painful for me..

I want to bring happiness to him,but he bring the painful truth to me ..

then, i fall asleep..
the next time i open up my eyes.. i saw him putting his beanie hat.. get ready for our morning walk...
I still can see his hand and foot trembling.. so skinny and pale.. I can’t let my tears fall.. I don’t want to see his trembling hand to wipe off my tears.. It just to painfull ..
Carl : "hey.. you awake" (sitting beside me)
Daisy: "are you okay?"
Carl: "i never been better actually (faint smile), c'mon i need to show you something "
Daisy: “can you walk carl? I’m worried.. its fine.. we will go later okay?”
Carl: “… I.. don’t know.. can we just go now ? c’mon.. it’s important for me ..”

Daisy: “Carl.. please don’t force yourself.. I won’t go anywhere tomorrow .. okay ?”
Carl: “No..”

Daisy: “ its for your own good.. I don’t wanna see you pass out again..”
Carl: “ Daisy.. C’mon …. Pleaseeeeee?”
Daisy: “… you must promise me one thing..,”
Carl: “ what is it?”
Daisy: “Don’t pass out ! okay? I’m worried..”
Carl: “Naaah.. I won’t you are not strong enough to carry me though”

So then we walk out somewhere,I drove the car, he sitting there and give me the direction.

We went to the beach this morning,he keep walking… then stares into the beautiful blue sky like he never saw it before..  we sat down in a bench over there..

And I feel like I know what he feel. We didn’t even say a thing.. just to enjoy the beautifull sky we had there.. but then he asked me :

“hey daisy ..?”

“yeah?”
“would you sing me a lullaby?”
“Why..”

“so I can sleep with your voice inside my head”

Then I hold his cold hand and then I did for what he asked.

“Last night I had.. a crazy dream..

 wish was granted just for me..

it could be for anything…

I .. didn’t ask for money

Or a mansion in Malibu

I simply wish… one more day with you..

(I started crying)

One more day..

One more time..

One more sunset maybe I’d stratified…

But then again…

I know what it would do..
leave me wishing.. still…

One more day..

With.. you..”

His cold hands still holding me.

but I know he is not there.

He is sleeping.

“First thing I'd do… is pray for time to crawl….
Then I'd …  unplug the telephone…
And keep the TV off
I'd hold you every second
Say a million… I love you….
That's what I'd do,

with one more day ...

with you..”

then my tears fall down. I couldn’t bear it.

but then again I know what it would do.

˳ ˳ ˳

The funeral started today, and its my birthday. He did kept his promise. I already saw a lot of beautiful daisy flower at that day.Beautiful.. but sad..I can’t cry anymore…

All my tears already fall down for him.

His mom come at me and said
“daisy..i know its hurt.. but are you sure you don’t want to know the truth? ”
“its okay auntie.. sometimes truth can remain silent.”

She hug me and cry. I hug her back.. and I said

“is all over, and theres nothing we can do” and then we go home.

The next day, I went to his appartement and saw those music box with truth written in top of it .

I know what he meant..

“sometimes truth better to remain silent.”

-∞-